No Regrets.

Everything happens for a reason right? I was thinking about this and if everything happens for a reason then we shouldn't regret things. Sure, maybe we didn't want to do something, but it changed you in the bigger picture. So even if you think you made a mistake, somewhere along this journey you might realize how it might have helped you grow or helped you learn from your mistake. I am a firm believer in learning from your own mistakes. Granted, you might not want to make every mistake, but you will learn from the ones you make better then from someone else telling you not to. EXAMPLE: If a mother tells her child, "Dont play with fire you'll burn yourself." I'm pretty sure the child will do it and AFTER they burn themself they truly learn that hmm maybe fire isn't a good thing to play with. I am not saying go out and do something really dumb, I am just saying that, back to my original topic, you will learn from things that you do so you maybe you shouldn't live your life regretting everything wrong you do. As long as you learn from it then you shouldn't have regrets. Yes, sometimes I wish I knew why things happened. Not the typical arguement of "Why did God let this happen?" but asking myself "Why did I let this happen?"

Music always gets me thinking.

I know I have already kinda touched base with this in an earlier blog, but man the past couple days I find myself thinking about it alot. Songs have such a great affect on me, and maybe it's because I am an artistic person and we are more "emotional." But when I listen to music, the words really hit home sometimes. Lately I feel like I shouldn't be thinking about the words the way I am, like it bringing back memories I shouldn't dwell on. I have found myself, in my car, ipod on shuffle, and hearing a song and immediately thinking of someone or something and I get all emotional. IT'S LIKE A ROLLER COASTER! Don't you just hate it when you don't want to think about something, and the more you try not to the more you do or things remind you of it? Yeah, that's been me the past few weeks. And when I'm asleep, and have no control over what I'm thinking about...it's there too! I cant seem to shake it and at the same time I don't want to shake it. This is where I am at crossroads. Here comes Michelle, the torn one, the one who can never make up her mind, the one who always has to opposing opinions and thoughts. Maybe I am one of those weird chicks you read about in books, the ones who have two different personalities. One good, one evil. (Don't freak out I'm not bipolar or schizophrenic just talking figuratively.) It really frustrates me, but for right now, I don't know what to do about it.

Maybe It's Not My Weekend...

But it's gonna be my year. I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere. And this is my reaction to everything I fear. Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here. <<< that my friend, is truly how I have been feeling lately. Maybe it's just Senioritis...but I doubt it. I am a person of new, change, adventure, random. So being in the same place, at the same school, with the same people for a few years is starting to get to me. It's not just school, only been there for five years. It's not just where I live, only been living here for eleven years. It's not just the people, I meet people all the time...It's everything. I am ready for a new place, new people, new experiences. I'm so sick of being here and going through the motions. I am not one to get attached, so it's easy to say I probably wont miss anything about being here. Sure, I'll miss maybe two or three people, but life goes on.